My oldest Daughter turned 18 a couple of weeks ago and when I told friends how we were celebrating I received a variety of responses. A couple of them sounded like this;
“Seriously, you’re getting her a tattoo? Seriously, you’re letting her get a tattoo?”
My reply was this;
“Seriously yes I am getting her a tattoo and seriously yes, I’m letting her get one.”
I want to talk about why I had such peace about this decision and why it’s so far from a decision to fret over. Madison has talked about getting a tattoo for a couple of years now. I don’t care for tattoos and don’t desire to ever have one myself. When I was young I probably viewed them as rebellious, dirty, trashy, etc.
A typical stereotype that was false and I was all those things without possessing a tattoo so there, in my face!
Originally, I told Madison no for multiple reasons such as, she was too young to make such a permanent decision, she wasn’t certain of what content she wanted, and she was a minor. Nearing her 18th birthday she talked about it more and more. I asked her why she wanted one, what she wanted to have put on, and told her at 18 she doesn’t technically need my permission.
The beautiful thing about this child is that she still wanted my approval for her own peace of mind. I told her yes but I wasn’t going to pay for it… who knows why i said that. As time passed, we talked more and more about it. My concern was that she would eventually change her mind and not want it. Or style and preferences would change and she’d be stuck with it. So, My advice to her was choose something faith based.
Many things go out of style but our faith never will.
Choose a location on her body that she is comfortable wearing any article of clothing, and pray about it. If she still felt determined when her birthday came then go for it.
The day before her birthday she asked, “Mom, do you want to go with me?” I told her i didn’t have to because her friends were going. My sweet girl replied with, “Mom, I want you to go with me and I want to spend the day with you.” My heart be still (heart eyes). Well of course I wanted to do that and what she didn’t know was that I WAS in fact going to pay for it. We had a great day. Starbucks, tattoos, lunch, and shopping.
Here’s the deal. I care more about her heart and spirit more than I care about tattoos. I want her to love the least of these, care for others, be kind and respectful, put God first and always have a heart for him. Now she wears this beautiful word on her body that says “Beloved” She is God’s beloved and His daughter. I’m just lucky enough to borrow her sweet soul.
I honestly could care less if she marked her entire body with tattoos. I just pray Jesus is stamped all over her heart.
Moms, I have worried about the wrong things before but I want to tell you that some things matter and some things don’t. Taking time, talking through pros and cons, and helping our child make an important decision is what we do as parents. I’m so grateful I get to do that.